Hello friends! Today I would like to take a few moments to share with you some insight on bonding with shy and timid dogs. As an animal shelter, we work with a variety of animals everyday. Some of the dogs we see aren’t always ready to jump into your lap and lick your face. Just as you and I have stories to tell about the lives we have lived that haven’t always been easy, so do dogs; but they aren’t able to tell us what they’ve been through. While we don’t always know the specific circumstances that have led a dog to feel so unsafe in our world, it is possible to rebuild trust.
It takes time, commitment, patience and consistency to bond to a shy or timid dog that has been through difficult times.
Although there are many times that “same-day” adoptions are safe and appropriate, there are some times where our “harder-to-place” dogs need some time to adapt to their potential owner. This might mean several meetings, many walks, introductions to other pets, and more. Although this can be time consuming and require patience, it can be very rewarding, for both adopter and doggo.
Imagine it from the dog’s point of view: You wake up one morning and everything is different. Your toys are gone. The bed that you use to lie on is nowhere to be seen. Or maybe, you have spent a lifetime chained to a tree. Maybe you have never even had toys. Worse, maybe you have been hit or kicked for no reason, or spent months or years with no human interaction. No routine, no affection. No rules, no structure.
Then all of the sudden, you are in a car. Everything looks different and smells different. You are scared and confused. When you arrive to the shelter, everything is different yet again. Around you, others are barking and crying. You do not know what is going to happen next. How can you learn to trust these people? Or the next people? How are you going to learn to love again? It’s really no wonder that that bonding with a rescue dog can be a slow process.
It is very important to get to know a dog on his or her own time. If the dog is uncomfortable and doesn’t want to come near you, let that happen. All of the dog’s signals need to be respected. Try to keep your voice low, and try sitting on the floor. The best thing to do is to make sure the dog feels safe and non-threatened.
One of the best things you can do to begin a bonding process with a dog is to take them for a walk. It is no secret; dogs love walking! During your first few interactions with the dog, make sure that you are walking in a quiet place to avoid loud noises, traffic, and other people.
While there is no doubt that walking encourages closeness and bonding, we also like to encourage feeding as an effective bonding tool. Sitting in a room with your dog while you quietly check e-mail or do some low-key chores while feeding your pup treats will let them know they are safe. For purposes of too much fat, it might be a good idea to incorporate raw carrots or pieces of fruit into the treat regimen. Don’t expect the dogs to immediately eat from you hand, either.
Playing is another wonderful way of bringing fun and closeness into yours and your dog’s relationship. Try soft toys or balls at first, and soft encouraging words when the dog is having fun.
Another tip we like to tell people is to brush their dog. Start off slowly, and go from there. As with any activity with your dog, you want to see if they like it at first and take it slow. Not only is brushing an important part of grooming and proper hygiene, but let’s face it; It feels great!
The last point we would like to make is not to take the dog’s shyness personally. It is not that the dog doesn’t “like” you- it’s that you haven’t earned the dog’s trust yet, and he doesn’t know you.
In my personal experience, I had a rescued dog years ago that didn’t trust people. His name was Kitchi. He was fearful and timid. I worked with Kitchi slowly and consistently to break him out of his shell. He became a confident, happy dog that loved to play. I have also been lucky enough to have witnessed people come into the shelter and dedicate their time and energy to building relationships with timid dogs. Not only do adopters owe it to themselves to build a loving and quality relationship with someone who could be their best friend, but also the only way for dogs to learn to love and trust again, which is a chance they may have not otherwise had.
In Loving Memory of Kitchi
Shaina R. Mugford, Shelter Administrator
The Ark Animal Shelter